If jokes
What happens if a boy bumps into a dog?
It’s a bumper team.
In my mother's generation, they grew up with Wonder Woman. In ours, we have to wonder if she's a woman.
Why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always in the back (if you know what I mean)?
There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died, he will let them in.
The first one said, "I just finished a long day of work and I get home, and right as I stepped in, I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody, so I got a drink and went to the balcony, and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands, but he wouldn’t fall, so I threw a Refrigerator at him, and I fell with the Refrigerator."
God busted out laughing and let him in.
The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, "So get this, I’m a window washer on the 8th floor. I’m washing the windows like normal, and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands, and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die."
God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair, and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people, and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. "So get this, I’m in a refrigerator..."
What's the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Answer: The mosquito stops sucking if you slap hard enough.
One time a kid came to the hospital and said, "I really need help." The kid said he was really hot, so they put an ice cold towel on him.
Then the doctor asked him if he had any problems, and he said, "Yes, I am really hot." The doctor realized that he looked fine, so he said, "Are you sure? You look amazing." And the kid said that he meant to say, "I look hot!"
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
If you're ever bored just fuck some orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What do you call an autistic kid if he was short?
A short tistic.
I asked the emo kid if they get jealous when their phone dies.
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?
Like if you love food!
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
like if you know someone that is emo.
If you’re bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Roses are red, colors are blue, if I was you, I'd look like you.
Like if you like dogs. Dislike if you like cats. Other animal? Tell me in the comments!
One day my sister was making hotdogs. My sister asked me if I wanted some. I said no. Then my sister asked my friend, and he always said no.
Then my sister said I have to eat it plain with no flavor. We have no ketchup, mustard, or onions. My friend said I got something to give it flavor. My sister said, "Okay."
My sister left the kitchen to get something. I asked my friend what are you going to do. Then he took the hotdog bread, opened it, and ran his penis all around it, and put some white cream that came out of his penis. I put the hotdogs on the bread. Then my sister came back and put hotdogs on the hotdog bread. I told my sister the hotdogs are ready. She ate them. I asked how were the hotdogs. My sister said, "I don’t know what flavor is this, but it is very tasty."
I asked an American if their national anthem was "Pumped Up Kicks."
If you kill an emo, Is it an assist kill?