Identity jokes
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
Hi, my name is Jeff.
Wife: Honey, I’m pregnant. Husband: Hi Pregnant, I’m dad. Wife: No, you’re not.
Like if you are straight; comment if you are LGBTQ+; dislike if you are a Nazi.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
... family photo.
My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat
Jesus is fake,
He hides from himself.
Borthwick's hairline.
Kate: Can we have a threesome?
Trevor: Sure.
The lights go off and Trevor starts doing what he's supposed to be doing, and then he feels something going up his back end. He goes to punch the person behind him, but then he turns on the light, and it was Kate behind him, and he's been fucking the guy the whole time.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
Two mates walk into a bar.
Mate 1: "Shit! Look at that spider over there!"
Mate 2: "Whateverrrrrrr."
Mate 1: "No, seriously, it's bloody massive!"
Mate 2: "(Turns around) Shit, that's huge, I thought you were joking."
Mate 1: "No, I'm Fred King, Jo King's brother ;-)"
I am a motherfucker.
What is an emo's least favorite game? Fruit Ninja.
The bully: You're gay.
The nerd: I am.
The bully: Yeah.
The nerd: Then what are you?
What do you call it when orphans take a family photo? A selfie!
I saw identical twins. I threw a paper plane at them.
Things we all do:
Call the Royal blue tang fish the "Dory fish," and the Clownfish "Nemo fish"! 🤣
I do this too often!
Gays, blacks, and your maw, mate.
What do you call a gay friend?
Miguel Del Rosario Domingo.
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-