Humor
Line (DYM 105)
My crush: OMG, my dog just died!😭😭😭😭😭
Me: Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I am here for you!
My crush: I have a boyfriend...🙄
Me: Yeah well, I have a dog.
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.
It must not be a good suicide story if you can tell it.
Why do y’all do this?
Because you're lonely.
My fucking life, cya.
I think my dad is too black because whenever he goes to bed and closes his eyes, he disappears. 🤣
"Knock knock."
"Why are you knocking on a wall? You're in the Twin Towers and they're going down!"
The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.
When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.
Don't crack this joke up!
What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?
"Meoooow!"
A man walks into a bar and ends up with a concussion.
Maybe if he looked where he was going, he wouldn’t have hit that pole.
Boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Why did the pen stop writing?
'Cause the pen wasn't very dependable.
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?
She is the only one that calls me "lamo."
Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs? Because their quacks are too small.
Mom: Are you seriously gonna die?
Me: No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing I'll do.
Here [are] some questions firesharky:
1. What color hair do u have?
2. What[s] MY parents['] names? What hospital [were] u born in?
3. What state [were] u born in?
Do not say I don't know.