Hows jokes
You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)
How do you get a Japanese fanclub? Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!
I like my women how I like my coffee... HOT.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
How do you keep a blind kid busy? Give him sandpaper and tell him it's a find-a-word. 😂🤣
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.
How do booties greet each other?
"What's crackin'?"
Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today.
Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow?
Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you.
Orphan: Why?
Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.
How many times does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Tentacles!
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
How do you make antifreeze?
You steal her blanket.
I had amnesia once... maybe twice.
Q: How do basketball players stay cool during a game?
A: They stand near the fans! 🏀🏀😆😆
How do clarinet players play a song?
They reed their music.
No matter how much I cry, the white people still left me hanging.
How did Stephen Hawking become a billionaire?
He won the F1 Wheelchair race.
I will remember my brother's last words: if you can't put a fork in a toaster, how about a spoon?
"How do celebrities stay cool?"
"They have many fans!"
How to get rid of your depression:
1. Stop self-pitying.
2. Realize you can't.
3. Fucking deal with it.
You're welcome.