House jokes

Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?

Of course it can, a house can't jump.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Water.

Water who?

Water you waiting for, just let me in!

Buy KFC = 1 dead orphan in your house.

Me: The last time I used Duolingo was when the dinosaurs went extinct.

Duolingo: Lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)

What's the difference between me and my best friends?

At least one of us has a house.

Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.

The orphan tried to play baseball, but he couldn't get home because home doesn't exist for him.

Q: How do you know it's time for bed at the Neverland Ranch? A: When the big hand touches the little hand.

Three Things I Want For Christmas From Santa:

1. A Lambo

2. A House

3. UR MOM

Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"

You know orphans are kinda like a house with no people in it.

Because it’s empty inside.

Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.

Why can't orphans play House Flipper?

'Cause they don't know what to do.

What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?

They get set free.

Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈

Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?

Orphan: I don't have a family.

Why did the orphan rob the bank?

To buy a house.

House for sale: five minutes from the beach or eight seconds if you fall.

Unbelievable! When I searched “house of spades,” all I saw was a slave home!

I had to go to my friend's house.

I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???