Hotness jokes
What did the beat say to the rapper?
"Drop it like it's HOT!"
I have to file a complaint against Spotify because I didn’t see you on my hot singles last week.
How does a rapper make tea?
He drops some HOT BARS into a cup.
How does a rapper stay warm in the winter?
With some HOT TRACKS!
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he loved to drop HOT DISHES.
Cremation. My final hope for a smokin’ hot body!
Yo mama is such a slut, she could get slapped by a pack of hot dogs and get pregnant.
Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day.
Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first.
Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am.
Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet.
Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you.
Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you.
Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down.
Most restaurants are closed at night, but your legs aren’t.
I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out.
Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight.
Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately, but I hope it’s you.
Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream.
Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you.
Do you sing in the shower? Because if so, I need a private ticket of your concert.
Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between.
Are you a blanket? Because you’re on top of me every night.
Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7.
Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream.
I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not.
Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down.
Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up.
Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.
Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
Ever wonder why pride month is so hot?
It's just a free trial of what's to come for the celebrators...
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was flaming hot wings.
What do furries and fast food lovers have in common? They both love hot dogs.
How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.
A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"
Not a joke.
Any girls looking for a steamy hot man?
A note for My arts/health teacher:
oh ms aziz, you've got no rizz, all she do is screams, whether u like it or not, she thinks this makes her hot, she thinks this makes her pop but it just makes me want to crack her head from the top, until she says STOP, and down on the ground she goes plop... and her screaming has finally stopped, and my plan hasn't flopped thus far.... plan B is ram her with my car, fill her shoes with tar, and the prahnas i'll set on her go RAWR... she don't know what she coming for.
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
You're in Australia. Your forehead is the reason why Africa is so hot.
Yo mama so hot that even Sodapop Curtis flirts with her.