Homeless jokes
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
Why can't a homeless person win a baseball game?
They can't find home plate.
Yo mama is so poor, she asked a homeless guy for money.
Q: What was the orphan's first phone?
A: The iPhone X because it had no home button.
A beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide.
A homeless man walks by her and says, "What are you doing?"
She says, "I'm going to jump!"
The homeless man says, "If you're going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"
The woman replies, "No way, creep! Never that!"
The homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says, "That's fine, I'll just wait 'til you're at the bottom."
What did everyone say about the crazy unemployed homeless man?
He made no cents.
What do you call a homeless Hitler?
A roofless dictator.
Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?
To get them into his van.
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.
How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
“You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”
What does an orphan have that a homeless person doesn’t?
A home, but what does a homeless person have that orphans don’t?
A parent.
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.
Why are orphans so good at GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
My friend looks like a homeless, thanks for the jokes.
What's the difference between a homeless person and a car?
Only one gets fuel.
I look at my girlfriend’s ass like a homeless man looks at a trash can.
Like it’s my next meal.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
Joe mama so fat that she is homeless wit you.
Why do homeless people commit crimes?
They get a bed in jail.