Homeless jokes
What does the child with no hands get for Christmas? Unknown. He hasn't opened it yet.
What does a homeless man in New York get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
What do you call a kid with no home?
A homeless kid.
Why can't orphans do homework? They don't have a home.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
What’s a movie that’s related to an orphan? “Spider-Man: No Way Home.”
Orphans and homeless people are the same thing.
So, three guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank.
The first one goes for the richest man in the city’s vault but can’t open it easily and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man.
The second one goes for his uncle's vault because screw that son of a b***h; he’s rich, why does he need all the money? But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephew's neck.
The third one went for his ex’s vault and thought, “Well, that b***h can suck my d**k; she’s so poor anyway, who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness?” So he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasn’t heavily locked and took all her money. The next day, the third guy's ex showed up to his house and said, “I’m gonna f*****g murder you,” so she shot him dead and got her money from his house.
In hell, the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked, “You know, I don’t get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house, why does it need to be heavily guarded? I don’t understand why the poorer aren’t heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.” And the first guy said, “B***h, I don’t know, maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already.”
A homeless kid walked up to another kid and said, "I have what you don't." He said, "(Parents)."
And the kid said, "Your right, I do have parents," and walked away.
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.
The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"
That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.
What’s the benefit of dating a homeless woman?
You can drop her off anywhere.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
What do you call a homeless orphan?
Homo-less.
I asked the homeless woman if I could take her home. She said yes, so I took it.
I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.
All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."
We’re so poor, we can’t even afford free stuff.
I give bubblegum to the homeless so they can chew it and still be hungry.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
Why should you shoot a homeless crackhead in the head?
Because they're basically zombies.
What can you say about that homeless man's life and current status?
Wasted.