Home jokes

Why does an orphan like home base? Because he doesn't have one.

Why did the orphan join the baseball team?

Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.

I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.

Why can't orphans use a phone?

Because they don't have a home screen.

My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.

I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.

Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.

Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"

The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"

My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.

Why do all orphans have iPhone 10-12?

They don't have a home button.

I hit something when I pulled into my driveway.

And then I noticed that my cat was missing.

Why do orphans play Minecraft? Because they have no home.

When I hit a home run, I finally felt what it was like to have a home.

Why can’t orphans win trophies?

Because they can’t take them home.

Why are orphans not allowed in stores?

Because else they would actually feel at home.

Why do orphans use iPhone X's?

Because they can't find home.

I did have a good night, and I did a good night, and I had to walk around the house.

Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?

One day I was walking next to a homeless man, and he was eating grass. I asked him if he was hungry. He said yes. I said, "Follow me." You should have seen his face when I showed him my backyard!

Why can't orphans have cookies?

They are home made.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can’t get a home run.