Home jokes
What's an orphan's favorite shop? Home Depot.
You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.
I was an orphan as a kid, but I have never had a bitch, so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming, and she said, "Mofo, you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to!"
Apple created the iPhone X for orphans because they don't have a home.
I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
"No Way Home" is just the life of an orphan.
My wife complained about me being childish. So I told her to get out of my fort.
What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”
He hid in her attic.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
The mailman came to drop the mail off.
Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.
Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."
Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
Why are orphans not allowed in stores?
Because else they would actually feel at home.
Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”
Why do orphans love Home Alone?
They like to see a familiar picture.
I got my husband a fridge for his birthday. His face lit up when he opened it.
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."