History jokes
Who are the fastest readers?
911 victims, they went through 72 stories in less than 10 seconds.
Are you the Twin Towers? Cause I'd love to take you out. 🤭
Who ended Franz Ferdinand's COD account?
He ended with a Black Handed bang.
You're so ugly, even the World Trade Center got a better transformation than you.
Why are the English so bad at chess?
Because they lost their queen.
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
I woke up today, and my mom said it was 1940.
In fields of gold, where sunshine beams, Monkeys swing and play, it's their dreams. Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, Picking cotton with delight.
Their little hands so quick and neat, Plucking the cotton, can't be beat. They chatter and laugh, they dance and play, In the fields all day, they'll stay.
Their tails so long, their ears so big, They're quite the sight, it's quite a gig. They're busy as can be, you see, In the fields of cotton, they're free.
So let us marvel at these little thieves, In the fields of gold, they give and receive. Their antics bring us joy and delight, In the fields of cotton, they're always right.
I was rooting for Donald Trump to be president.
We haven't had a presidential assassination in a while.
The towers collapsed on 9/10, not 9/11.
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
Why is England so bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they lost their queen.
Why are 9/11 victims so good at reading?
Because they can go through 100 stories in 5 minutes.
What do you call a Titan who can't swim?
Titanic!
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp. It would be unthinkable. My version is imagine the Titanic with a lisp, it would be unsinkable.
What did the front half of the Titanic say to the other half when it hit the iceberg? I'm breaking up with you.
I've been sad recently that the Twin Towers aren't around, so I made the conclusion to build a time machine to watch it again.
What did Al-Shehhi say to Mohamed Atta?
"We are on time!"
"What's the wifi password?"
"121i362"
"It's not working."
"What wifi are you trying to connect to?"
"The United Airline."
"We're in the World Trade Center, though."
Heil Kyle!
Never talk about 9/11 to me. I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot ;(
For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.