History jokes
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.
"Can't go under it, can't go over it, we gotta go through it!"
Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended World War II.
Bro never learned how to play Jenga. 🙄
Hitler only wanted peace.
A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Did you hear that Michael Jackson once got food poisoning?
He ate 12-year-old nuts.
Why were the twin towers fighting?
Because they ordered pepperoni but got plain.
Why did the Titanic sink?
Because the people aboard are stupid.
Why were the twin towers fighting?
Because they ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.
I'd tell a 9/11 joke, but it would crash and burn.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
Why is Black History Month the shortest month of the year?
A Russian wedding should be called a Soviet Union.
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970, and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband.
She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband?
He was a Christian, so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? The Bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes, it does, and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? That's not funny.
I'll tell ya what's funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
What is white, blue eyed, blonde haired and somehow was made in Galilee during the Roman occupation?
An Italian Renaissance painting that was carbon dated.
What's the difference between the Christ and Anti-Christ? The Romans put sugar syrup on the second one.
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.