Him jokes

There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.

Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.

Why was the orphan so successful? Because once someone told him "go big or go home," and he only had one option.

One time, Little Johnny heard his parents "wrestling" in their bed. So the next morning, he went to rape all the little girls in school. This then led to his demise.

No girls told on him, but when he grew up, he was a raper. He never stopped. In total, "little" Johnny had over 31 sons that he didn't know about. When he was sentenced to jail, he raped all the inmates despite his small figure. He was then sent to the death sentence, "eagle wing" torture style.

His parents were happy he died, and the morbid rapist was put down, never to return again. However, all the sons had his genes, including his MINDSET. They then became a cult and shot down 2014 cops, 471 military members and 72951 males and females. The kids, you ask? Only the males were spared, and taught how to operate the guns. All but 419 females were killed. They soon became the world's strongest empire. No one could stop Little Johnny's sons. NO ONE.

A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find God, he'll help you!"

Then the man said, "There’s only one way to get to God, and that is through Jesus. Have you, my friend, found him?"

What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?

Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.

A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm.

"This place looks scary," the kid said.

And the man replies, "I know right, I have to walk out of there alone."

  • 3

    • One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂

    Lewandowski is so fast because whoever would think of adding an engine to him is a genius!

    Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

    I saw a kid in a wheelchair and I screamed, "EXTREME PARKOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    Imagine if the kid in a wheelchair was in Fast and Furious. His wheelchair is the only one that keeps him going.

    There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

    She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

    Son said, "But I can't see."

    Mom said, "That's the point."

    - The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.

    - How did the gay person die? Homicide.

    - Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.

    - When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.

    - I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.

    - I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.

    - How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.

  • 5

    • An adopted kid is walking to school when an emo kid approaches him. He says the emo kid, "Do you have rope?"

    "No," replies the adopted kid.

    "Dang it! I hate you," says the emo kid. "Now the adopted one is angry. Well, at least I'm loved," says the adopted kid.

    If you know an emo kid, please stay away. The depression is contagious. I'm a survivor.

    Like if you dislike emos.

    One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.

    Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"

    Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."

    Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

    This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.

    Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.

    Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"

    Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.