High jokes
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards...
The steaks were pretty high.
What did the weed say before he got on the escalator?
People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
Thomas Bulgin loves McDonald's dollars, A man of simple tastes, he hollers, With every visit, his heart does flutter, For golden arches, a fast food lover.
Those crispy fries, so perfectly fried, And burgers stacked, oh so high, The smell of grease, it fills the air, Thomas Bulgin, he'll always be there.
A dollar menu, his saving grace, A feast for him, a smile on his face, He counts his coins, with eager eyes, To savor each bite, a little prize.
In this world of fast-paced lives, Thomas Bulgin, he surely thrives, For in those golden arches, he finds, A moment of joy, that forever binds.
He cares not for gourmet cuisine, Nor fancy plates, fit for a queen, For in his heart, a simple truth, McDonald's dollars, his fountain of youth.
So let him eat, and let him feast, Thomas Bulgin, the fast food beast, For in those golden arches, he's found, A taste of happiness, unbound.
What talks high pitched and can't fly?
A gay man in Iran.
Stephen Hawking had a high I.Q., but still had to learn how to be disabled.
Why did Hitler kill himself?
His gas bill was too high.
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
How do rappers greet each other?
With a high five and a mic drop!
I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.
I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
What kind of tree can you High-Five?
A palm tree.
Your mama is so fat. Her high school picture is an aerial photograph.
My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...
I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.
Why do emo kids hate high fives?
They’re always left hanging.
What is an emo girl's favorite map in Halo?
Hang 'em high.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder to reach the really high notes?
Roses are red, violets are blue, the stonks are high, and so are you.
Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?