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Coma

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

The image is a three-panel comic. In the first panel, a doctor leans over a patient in a hospital bed and says, "PLEASE... If you can hear my voice..." In the second panel, another person says, "It's no use! He's in a deep coma!" In the third panel, someone says, "Wakey wakey eggs and bakey."

Florida Man

tabs1528 · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a tweet by Robert Littal (@BSO). The tweet contains a headline about 'Florida Man' and describes how he told his neighbors he would 'kill them with kindness,' then proceeded to try and attack them with a machete he named 'Kindness.' Below the text is a mugshot photo of the man with a small injury on his forehead.

Meme

DAP ME UP · 1 year ago

...

A digitally altered image featuring the cartoon character Butt-Head from "Beavis and Butt-Head" with a real person's head superimposed over the character Beavis. Butt-Head is lying on a blue mat, looking distressed and exclaiming, "- Ahi help! He's got a boner!" The figure superimposed on Beavis is on top of Butt-Head. The background shows other cartoon figures wearing athletic uniforms.

Phase

Daddy dick · 3 years ago

Bro hes not bald

A person with a bald head smiles and the image says, "I'M NOT BALD. IT'S JUST A PHASE."

Cat

Adolf kitler · 1 year ago

A black cat with a white paw print on its back lies on a wooden floor. The text says: "Cat wandered into kitchen where my daughter was baking, and now apparently he's taking the Hobbits to Isengard."

Restraint

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a dark mode text post displays an explicit fanfiction excerpt. A picture of Walter White from Breaking Bad, wearing his Heisenberg hat and glasses, with a beard, is superimposed over the text. Red circles highlight Walter White's face, the words 'Say my name,' and 'name.' The text describes a highly suggestive scene where a character is 'trembling from restraint' and eventually pleads, 'Please. I need you. Say my name.' The final sentence reads: 'He's falling apart. He's breaking. You're making him burn, and he loves every second of it.'

Circle

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a blue circle with a point on top. Underneath is a scene from the movie 'The Emperor's New Groove' with Kronk saying "No, no. He's got a point".

Album

RapBoat · 2 years ago

JAY-Z ON TOP

A close-up photo features Jay-Z wearing sunglasses with a part of a tweet about him overlayed. The tweet says "Jay-Z should release an album (or mixtape) to show this new generation that he's HIM."

Diary entry

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a page from a diary with hand-written text and a small drawing of a person on a couch looking dejected.

Bakugou

KatsukiBakugouSimp · 4 years ago

.o.

The image is a two-panel comparison of the anime character Bakugou. The first panel is a black and white drawing of him looking sassy with arms crossed while another person is bowing down. The second panel is an anime illustration where Bakugou is angrily confronting a child. Text over both panels reads: "i find it funny how bakugou gets so sassy whenever he's dealing with kids".

Colon

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A compilation of five tweets. The top left tweet by Sarah says: 'when you hug a guy and you smell his colon 💕'. The top right tweet by tayLORD says: 'When you can still smell his colon on your pillows even though he's not there >>>>>'. The large central tweet by RichOrb says: 'I love when I can smell a guy's colon as he walks by 😍'. The bottom left tweet by jen says: 'after you hug a boy and you smell like his colon <33'. The bottom right tweet by Stylish Sweetheart says: 'I smell like his colon now ♡'. The tweets all mistakenly use the word 'colon' instead of 'cologne'.

Femboy

Shitpost master-general · 11 months ago

A person wearing a light-colored hoodie, a black and white plaid pleated skirt, and black tights, holds a fish with both hands. The fish is a rainbow trout, with speckled skin. A large red circle highlights the fish, and a red arrow points towards it. Below the image, white text reads: "He's never been held by a femboy before."

God

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A person in a hospital bed surrounded by a vast array of medical equipment, including monitors, tubes, and pumps. Text overlay reads: "religious people will see this and say 'He's in God's hands now'". A watermark in the lower left says "@anti_theist_v1.0".

Interview

BellaTrix · 3 years ago

Me!

A multi-panel image showing a scene from an interview with a woman, presumably Bellatrix, next to a man in a suit. In the first two panels, she says "Could she, stop, okay. Come on." and the man says, "This is my ship." The next two panels have speech bubbles, "Interview: This is about growing up on Potter then, Okay. She hasn't. She's never grown up on Potter to this day when you..." and "Interview: Do you have any stories or anything about children any of the other people being around. "It's pretty much grown up with them."" The bottom row shows her saying, "My god. So much more handsome." and him saying, "He's really gotten into a suit.". The last panel shows her saying, "He does unbelievably more mature than me but that's not saying much."

Deadpool

Wade · 2 years ago

The image shows four panels from the movie The Sixth Sense. In the first panel, a young boy is looking afraid and the text reads 'I SEE DEADPOOL'. The second panel shows a man talking to the boy, and the text reads 'YOU MEAN 'DEAD PEOPLE''. In the third panel, the boy is saying 'NO, DEADPOOL. HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU.' The fourth panel shows Deadpool standing behind the man.

Anarchy

Toast ツ · 3 years ago

The image shows two panels. In the first panel, there are three characters. The first character is spraying an anarchy symbol on a wall with the word "TWITTER" on top of it, the second is spraying the letters "NT" on that wall. The third character is watching them. In the second panel, a character with a surprised look is pointing and saying "HE'S BREAKING THE TERMS OF SERVICE!".

Pizza box

Silly Sonka · 2 years ago

Why?

A man and a woman are lying in bed next to each other. The woman is looking at the man and thinking, "I bet he's thinking about other women." The man is looking up and thinking, "Why is a pizza box a square, the pizza a circle, and the slices are triangles?"

Palpatine

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a YouTube video with a red arrow pointing at the face of Palpatine. Above his head, it says "HATES DEMOCRACY". Below the video title reads "I worked for Palpatine, he's a fraud". In the comment section, the user comments "Cry about it".

Egg

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A woman is lying in bed looking annoyed. Next to her is a giant egg. The text above the image reads: "Her: he's probably thinking about other girls... Him: I am egg". There is a Twitter account name of @DennysDiner above the text.

Electronics

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

Explain Bear won’t understand because he’s retarded.

A political cartoon by Glenn McCoy showing a street scene in Baltimore. The "BALTIMORE TVs & ELECTRONICS" and "LIQUOR & CIGARS" stores are on fire with broken windows, and looters are running away with an HDTV and beer. The "BELTS & SUSPENDERS" store remains completely untouched and open for business, suggesting the looters have no interest in belts.

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