Hes jokes

He is looking for children. If you don't know who EDP445 is, look him up.

Be careful around EDP445.

Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination, but he did go everywhere.

How do you find out if your kid is gay?

Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.

When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!

Why did the lemon 🍋 go to the doctor 👩‍⚕️?

Because he had a sour stomach.

A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.

Kurt Cobain didn't mean to kill himself. He was just so high he thought the shotgun was a bong.

His lyrics are so ironic but so true. "I'm not coming back". "I swear I don't have a gun."

My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.

Did you hear about the guy who got fired for having sex with his clients?

He was a great veterinarian.

The orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home.

Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?

Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!

I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.

Why did Hitler turn to genocide after a failed career as an artist?

He never learned to mix the colors.

A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.

How did the man with no arms commit suicide?

We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.

Why can't Biden play chess?

Because he doesn't have the towers.

It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. “No,” says the neighbor. “The seat is empty.” “This is incredible,” said the man. “Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?” The neighbor says, “Well, actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.” “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible... But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat?” The man shakes his head. “No,” he says. “They’re all at the funeral.”

when Ted Bundy found out he was getting the death penalty, he was pretty shocked...

Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.