Hes jokes
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?
A: He was caught littering.
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
My dad and I were fishing one day.
That’s where he met my stepmom.
Memes
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was out-standing.
Why did the orphan try to get hurt?
Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.
He looks around, no one is there.
I was on an orphan's website, but I pressed on his profile and realized he had no home page.
What did they give Elmo before he left the factory? Two test-tickles.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.
I was walking till I saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said, "Where are your parents?" He cried even more.
Oh, I just love talking to orphans.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
He sing, he dance, he he.
I remember waving at this guy in the street. The a**hole didn't wave back... Come to think of it, he was also swinging around a weird stick.
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.
We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!
Hey, my grandfather was part of WWII. Yeah. He killed Hitler!
I gave my blind friend a cheese grater for Christmas.
He said it was the most violent book he ever read.
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but he couldn’t stand up?
Why was the emo kid thrown out of the amusement park?
He kept cutting in line.
(There was a mommy tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato.)
Baby: Wait for me!
(Father tomato walks back toward the baby.)
(He squishes the child.)
Father: Ketchup!