Herring jokes

My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.

A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."

One day, a lady and her husband were talking and it was time for dinner. He got up and sat at the dining room table, and the lady brought the plate of food in and she sat it down in front of him. "What's this?" he said. The lady said, "A piece of shit...honey! Want some water to drink?"

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and then give her blood so she can bleed more.

It’s almost take her to Spirit Halloween, and then rail her in a spooky mask season.

Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and give her it so she can bleed more.

Me: I have the body of a 28 year old.

Her: Prove it.

Me: (opens freezer)

Yo momma so fat not even Dora could explore her.

Yo mamma so fat that she like that ocean, we haven't even explored 5% of her yet.

Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."

At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, “That’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”

“Why should it?” answered her spouse. “I keep telling them it’s for you.”

Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.

My teacher said, "Words don't hurt!"

So I threw my dictionary at her.

Yo mama so fat, Donald Trump built a wall around her.

Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"

Her (DYM 101).

There were three women, one was curvy in all the right places, one was skinny but had a booty on her, and last but not least there’s one that has a BBL. Then comes in a famous rapper, guess which one he picked???

Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"

My girlfriend broke up with me today. Her mom had to take her to daycare. 😢😢😢