Herring jokes
My wife is so fat, she gets home, her ass gets home a half hour later.
My wife is so fat, I took her to the Macy's Day parade. They attached ropes to her.
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
My wife is so fat! She wears high heels, she strikes oil.
When she sits around the house, she really sits *around* the house. Every time she turns around, it's her birthday.
A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."
The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"
The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."
Memes
Your mama is so stupid. We were playing catch, and I told her to go deep. She grabbed a shovel and dug a hole.
Your mama is such a hoe! It took her 4 attempts to pass her driving test. She couldn't get used to the front seat.
Your mama is so stupid, her phone died, so she buried it in the backyard!
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
Yo momma so fat that it was hard to find the G spot and slip her one at night.
I lost my job at the bank. Some lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her.
Why is Jenna Marbles so funny? She lost all her marbles.
Your mom is so hairy that King Kong got jealous of her.
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was cutting onions, the onions cried instead of her.
Yo mama so ugly, when she sweats, the sweat runs down the back of her head to avoid her face.
Why did your mom cross the road?
You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.
Your sister is so short, she needs to roll up her panties.
Yo mama so scary that the monsters have to look under the bed for her.
Yo mama so ugly that the monsters thought that she was their mother.