What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing you already done told her twice
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
yo mama so fat she has her on gravitational pull
Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!
Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!
yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man her bowls fell out
Yo mama so fat that when god said let there be light he asked her to move out the way
Your mama is so stupid she put a ruler under her pillow to measure how long she slept
Yo mamma so fat that Thanos had to snap his finger twice to get her out of Existence
Yo mama so fat that State Farm tried to get on her side but couldn’t.
Yo mama so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed
Yo mama so fat when i swerved to miss her, i ran out of gas
Yo mama's so big, her belt size is "equator."
Q: How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? A: She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles
How do you embarrass a female archaeologist? Give her a used tampon and ask which period it came from.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.
Yo mama is so old that her first crhistmas was the first crhistmas
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
