Herring Jokes

A wife says to her husband 'you're always pushing me around and talking behind my back' 'what do you expect' he says 'you're in a fucking wheelchair'

What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves? I'm not a-moosed right now.

Every time you feel lucky to have your mother in your life, what should you tell her? I really hit the mother lode with you.

My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board

β€œNo I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken”.