I had a great day today because Allison was frustrated at her calculator and started banging it on the side of the table, and the teacher screamed, "Allison, how would you like it if I banged you on the table?"
Herring Jokes
Sayori: *dies*
Monika: "You kinda left her hanging... 😊"
MC: "😨"
Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
There is a joke that did not enter this page... Why? She is afraid they will laugh at her!
Me and my girlfriend were walking in the woods.
Her: I am scared!
Me: What do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.
Men should pay for the first date, that’s why it’s called a (men)u.
Then women should do the dishes, that’s why they call it a dish wash(her).
As an older brother, I always gave my little sister advice. I always said to do your best and never quit. So one day I went to her room. I see my sister giving married men blow jobs.
I ask what are you doing? The married men said she is giving us blow jobs because our wives don't do it. My sister said you told me to do your best, and my best is to suck them dry. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already done told her twice.
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
Yo mama so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.
Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!
Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!
Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.
Yo mama so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out the way.
Your mama is so stupid, she put a ruler under her pillow to measure how long she slept.
Yo mama is so fat that Thanos had to snap his fingers twice to get her out of existence.
Yo mama so fat that State Farm tried to get on her side but couldn’t.
