Her jokes
So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...
Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
What happens when Helen Keller picks her nose?
She slurs her words...
What's the difference between a (hypothetical) girl and cancer?
Her dad didn't beat cancer.
Yo momma is so fat, her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.
Your momma's so dumb, she took her driving lesson on a dinosaur.
Memes
He placed the chocolates and the flowers down beside her.
Silence...
And then at last she spoke...
"Unexpected item in the bagging area."
My wife accused me of cheating. I told her she started to sound like my wife.
My daughter is super smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor.
Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.
What’s the difference a hooker an a drug dealer...?? A hooker can wash her crack an resell it.
One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.
Yo mama is so fat that when she put on a yellow dress, people called her "taxi."
A wife asks her husband: Am I pretty or ugly?
The husband answers her: Pretty.
The wife responds: Thank yo-
The husband interrupts her: Pretty ugly!
Yo momma is so ugly, Slenderman runs from her.
It's also why he has no eyes.
I work at a bank and an old woman asked me to check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.
Why did Mrs. Henderson get a divorce from her husband, Harry?
She was tired of everyone calling the family "Hairy" and the Hendersons.
Your mama so old, her first Christmas was the first Christmas!
What’s the worst thing about having a wife with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!