My love for you is like poop.
Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.
What do dogs and planks have in common? They both have to be walked.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Well, you don't have to cry about it, Gary.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I see you, I see you; you would have to work out.
If Donald Trump gets any worse, they'll have to replace Air Force One with a short bus.
They don’t have to invest a lot into the Stephen Hawking wax statue, though.
You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush.
All I have to do is go to the Africa section.
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
Bully: Shut up, motherfucker!
Me: Well, stop talking to me and I won't have to keep fucking your mother.
I hope you have to squeeze the hell out of toothpaste only for the little bit to fall down the sink drain.
Why did NASA have to go to space? Because space is lonely.
When you have to fight an emo kid, but he brings his friends, so you gotta fight the Suicide Squad. But you gotta get the boys to help you.
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
Why can an orphan not do school work? Because they have to take there work home to there parents
You have been a bad boy, so now I will have to pun-ish you!
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
Did you know Africans don’t have to be black
Family is precious, so you have to keep them away from the sunlight.
yo mamma so old that when she farts we have to dust again
