Have To

Have to Jokes

Mmmmmmmmhhh, can't believe how much you have to put it on the same. In meinen Jahren mache and Second hand.

were gonna have to kill

no good jack and jill

they’re draining the economy doooown!

they’ve spent our budget on weed

and lube to spill jack’s seed

they’ve ruined our wonderful town!

were gonna have to kill

nno good jack and jill

they have no moralityyyy

they’re spreading degeneracy

we aint what we used to be

we’ve got to kill ol no good jack and jill!

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water

but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana

they went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers

next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years

we’re gonna have to kill

nno good jack and jill!

they’ve banked off buying boooze!

they’ll drink and sell the price

at the original times thrice

corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.

we’re gonna have to kill

nno good jack and jill

their kids’re in the business tooo!

they’re draining all our banks

give em well deserved spanks

we’ve got to kill ol no good jack and jill

jack and jill netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaaake

what a blunder, there was no rubber, now

they’re a house of eeiiight

a bolt went off, they opened shop

to resell their porn and lean

it all went swell, but for us, well

we’re now an oligarchy!

WE’LL KILL OL JACK AND JILL!

A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, “You have to help me, I think I’m shrinking.” “Now settle down,” the doctor calmly told him. “You'll just have to learn to be a little patient.”

An ugly, poor teenage girl found a genie lamp in her backyard, the genie said, "I will grant you 3 wishes but under 1 condition." "What is it?" she asked. "After I grant your final wish you have to have sex with me," the genie replied. "Okay for my 1st wish I wish to be the Prettiest girl at my school," the genie snapped his fingers and made her pretty. "For my 2nd wish I wish for my family to be rich," the genie snapped his fingers and told her her family is now the richest in town. "And you final wish?" the genie asked. "I wish i had a sabertoothed vigina."

If you hate what you hear from Nickelback, at least you can get your nickel back.

If you have to deal with the noise from Deftones... unfortunately, not only are you unable to obtain any refund, but you may have become permanently deaf.

The reason why Trailer Park Boys is set in Nova Scotia and not Alabama is because if it was set in Alabama, then they would have to record every instance of incest. And the show's writers would need to know how to cram all of it in one season.

"Dude, can you believe Republicans are opposed to homosexuality, women's rights, and immigration, yet they are silent when it comes to incest and child molestation?"

"Well, I'm not surprised. Republicans have to win the Alabama vote, or else."

Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”

Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York

Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?" Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me." The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything." The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too."

A child and a child molester walk into a forest together. The child turns to the molester and says, "Boy, these woods are scary." The molester says to the child, "You think you're scared? I have to walk out of here alone."

Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why? -You have to be alive to have autism.