Greeting jokes
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning, and his dad was making a lot of mistakes. Suddenly, his dad screams, "Bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant, and his dad replied, "Aunts and uncles." Oh.
Next thing he hears is, “Dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks, "What's that mean?" To which his dad replied, "Uh, coats and hats." Oh. Next thing he knows, he sees his dad jumping around the bathroom yelling, "Fucking, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" "What does that mean, Dad?" And his dad yells, "Cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh.
Next week is Thanksgiving, and the doorbell rings. Johnny answers it and says, "Hey, bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, Dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey."
What does a polite mouse say?
"Cheese and thank you."
"Johnny, why wave?"
"Hi, Goo!"
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Dooris." "Dooris who?" "Door is locked, that's why I'm knocking!"
Hi how are you?
An orphan walks into a science lab. The lead scientist greets him and takes him to a DNA testing station. After some procedures, the results come back:
"UNKNOWN"
Hey Sandy.
Hola Jackie :^
What kind of tree can you High-Five?
A palm tree.
Why did the ocean wave?
It wanted to say "Hi Tide."
What did the fish say to the beach?
"Long tide, no see!"
How does an emo greet people?
“What’s down?”
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Who do you see over there???
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?
Good Morning, Sleepy-Head!
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
IBC.
IBC who?
I'll be seeing you later.
Hey Aria.
A blind man walked into a fish market and said... "Hello, ladies!"
Hey Danda, :^, Alex, Dangggg, Alya Kuhl, Jessica, Samantha, and Ariana!