Good jokes
Are you sad? Then don't be sad, because sad backwards is das, and das no good.
It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.
Most foresters have a wooden personality.
I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?
Why did the gorilla leave the mafia headquarters for good?
Teacher: Okay class, what's a word that begins with A?
Student: Apple!
Teacher: Good! What's a word beginning with B?
Student:....Bitch...
Yo mama so fat, I have to take a train, 2 buses, and 3 airplanes to get on her good side.
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was such a good pilot.
What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?
The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!
I have a huge thought: if Satan punishes people who are bad, doesn't that make him good?
Why do musicians in New Orleans smell so good?
Because they're jasmine (jazz men)!
Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.
Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.”
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
The teacher sat down and cried.
Kids are like a box of chocolates, they taste so good and you never know what you are going to get.
What did the traffic light 🚦 say to the car 🚗? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
Why are birds good at social media?
Because they "tweet" all the time!?
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
What do you call a dinosaur with good eyesight?
Do you think he saw us?