Girls jokes

Why are there no women in the NFL?

Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?

Boy: Crap, I hit a deer.

Girl: Awe... I guess it’s not so much of a dear.

Boy: ...

Boy: Get the hell out!

What did the girl say to the white guy? “You have a peener wiener!”

How did the blind girl get a date?

She said it was love at first sight.

A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."

Hey girl, is that an ass seen on TV, 'cause I'd buy it.

A magician walks up to a girl and asks her to feel the rabbit in the magician's hat.

The magician asks the girl to rub the rabbit. The girl notices the rabbit sticks up and drools; the hat was covering the hips.

What's the difference between an abortion and a baby girl in China? Nothing, they both die.

I woke up one day to find handcuffs on my bed. Turns out, the girl I drugged yesterday escaped.

I asked the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.

Q: What do you call a girl walking down a street?

A: Lost, she's supposed to be in the kitchen.

Boy: I'm dead.

Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?

Boy: No, I was just born this way.

Hey girl, are you a scientist?

Cause you made my thing into a baking soda volcano.

Boy: “My heart MELTS for you.”

Girl: “OMG, are you okay?!?!”

Boy: “Yeah, why?”

Girl: “Because if your heart is melting, then you are NOT okay.”

Who will hit the ground first, the girl or the apple?

I don't know, it depends if the girl is emo or not. If she is emo, the rope will catch her.

What’s worse than a girl getting a period?

A boy getting a period.

What's the difference between a pregnant girl and a light bulb?

... You can unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a pregnant girl.

If you're a girl, please comment.

Gwen, hi, this is well, I am not saying, are you a girl? I thought you were a girl, but I could be wrong.

My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.