Get Jokes

Q.if i go 1 on 1 with Harvey weinstein i wont get raped A. im not a 14 yr old girl

I was walking down main street when I saw a child.

I told him, "I will give you 20$ if you get a my balls back from the vet."

He replied, "Why did they take your balls sir?

"Beer plus going to the vet does not work well for everybody, expeciy when your a furry."

Roses are red I have free candy get in my van I have a gun handy

why are girls and rocks so alike? if there flat they get skipped.

What does food and dark humour have in common? Not everybody gets it

How many times does 42 go into 9? Get in the van to find out.

A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes"

Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree? A: Wave at him

What do you you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.

What does an orphan get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

What's the difference between Orphans and Apples? Apples get picked-

How is smoking similar to oral sex? The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢

friend 1: I don't want to jump. friend 2: me neither .murderer: if you don't jump ill stab you. friend 1: jumps. friend 2: jumps. murderer. i didn't mean off the building friend 1: I know that i just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy