Get

Get Jokes

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk walk and a car and get home and get a walk home and get a dog ๐Ÿ•? Today is the night I can drive.

๐ŸŒ: You're so hot!

๐ŸŒŽ: How are you single?

โ˜€๏ธ: I burn anyone who gets too close!

Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.

P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?

P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?

P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesnโ€™t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).

P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*

If you put your foot in a pond, your foot will get wet.

No joke, I just wasted about 5 or 6 seconds of your life.

There was a man. He came home with his friends from the bar and man was he ever wasted! Their friends made sure to get him home safely. The next morning, he woke up and found blood all over his nightstand. He called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.