Get jokes
Daughter: Dad, why are you so mean?
Dad: Because you are so mean, that's why.
Daughter: You so get on my nerves.
Dad: I am gonna slap you in your god darn head if you don't shut up.
Daughter: Wow, Dad, you savage.
Dad: 21 SAVAGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Daughter: Oh my God, I am tellin' Mom that you are doin' that thing again.
Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?
Because they are aimed at a younger audience.
If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?
Why did Sally get a black eye?
She tried to play patty cake!
If you get a divorce with your husband, does that still mean you’re siblings?
🎨🧑🏻🦰 day was that good fun day at home 🏠. I had to the earth and I love it when you get a home and walk walk home from school and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠. Was your birthday 🎁? I did.
So I meet with a therapist on a weekly basis. We talk about my depression and how it's been getting worse. Recently, I've been advised about my condition, and how I've been discussing with her about being suicidal. She's been very helpful throughout it. I was even told I can pay in advance from now on, so I don't have to worry about it later.
All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.
I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the rear end.
8 bit: Are you ok?
7 bit: Yes, I’m just a bit off...
Get it? 8 bits = a byte :)
Why are orphanages like dogs?
Because they get adopted.
Where do astronaut cows go to get milk?
The Milky Way!
Why can’t an orphan get suspended or expelled from school? Because they need to contact parents.
How do you get a depressed girl to suck your dick?
Pour bleach on it.
What do you get when a cow doesn't give any more milk?
A milk dud 😂
Kid: I want to be Batman.
Okay, when he gets home, his parents are dead.
Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?
A: 'Cause they can’t get back to home.
If an athlete gets athlete's foot... What does an astronaut get? Mistletoe!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!