Get jokes
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
Why was I stress eating on the train track?
To wait to get hit.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a line and you break your mommy's spine." She then steps on a line and her mother keels over screaming.
Girl playing outside: "Step on a crack and you break daddy's back." She steps on a crack the mailman next door then keels over screaming.
The husband starts celebrating, gets in the car, and starts to drive away.
The son comes outside and steps on a crack.
The dad then dies in a car crash.
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, because his parents ran away.
Double whammy. Orphan jokes are like a kid with cancer; it never gets old. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👌👌👌👌👌
Why did the bee get into trouble?
Because he wasn't beehiving very well!
Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied? Because they can never stand up for themselves.
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
Does anyone know where I can get that picture that went around the internet of Steven Hawking looking at the stairway to Heaven and saying “Oh Fu-k”?
Wanna hear a joke? Your face.
GET DUNKED ONNNNNN!
Why can't orphans get a home run?
Because they have no home to run to.
When I try to call my friend, I can't get through because my name is Lin Kon, and the operator keeps saying, "Yes, Mr. President."
Short people tend to get angry easily...
'Cause they're so close to the ground, their anger doesn't dissipate easily...
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay man's house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
What starts with the letter M, ends with -arriage and is a man's favorite thing? Miscarriage. That joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X? Because there's no home button.
What does a bird say when it gets sick?
I flu!
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
Your momma is so fat, when she gets done having sex she rolls over and smokes a ham.
I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.
Man, I loved that wheelchair.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.