Get jokes
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide!!! 😂
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
I am the least serious person ever, but whoever is joking about cancer is vile :)
Get some fucking respect, you silly tramp!
What's the difference between a high street betting firm and a prostitute?
You can get on with a prostitute!
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient.
The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient."
Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants.
Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage.
After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control.
Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?"
The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?
They get choked.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
How would Stephen Hawking get rid of the police?
Go to the junkyard.
If I was a poo, I’d be the one that gets stuck to the bottom of the shitter when no one wants ya xox.
If Stephen Hawking gets a heart attack, where do you go, the hospital or Curry's PC World?
If you get an apple a day, what does it give you?
Worms and rotten fruit.
All-star gay mix
Somebody once told me The world is gonna rape me The dick's the hardest part of the body She looked like she's having fun With her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" in her bumhole.
Well, I started cumming And she started cumming Fed with dick, she's in love with bumming Didn't make sense not to live for bum Your dick gets hard, but your ass gets numb.
So much to fuck, so much to suck So what's wrong with eating the asshole? You'll never know if you don't try You'll never taste if you don't lick.
Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a schlong, ass frail And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.
It's a gay place and they say it gets gayer You're licking bum now, wait 'til your a bit older But the bent boys beg to differ Judging by the hole in the homeless man's throat.
The sperm in the bath is getting pretty thin The sperms getting warm so you might as well swim My world's on cocaine, how about yours? That's the way I like it and I never get raped!
Hey now, you're a porn star Get your sex on, bum pain Hey now, you're a porn star Suck a willy, ass frale And all that glitters is cum Only sperm heads break the female egg.
The only difference between apples and orphans is apples actually get picked.
Q. What type of flour do orphans get?
A. Self-raising flour.
Why do orphans hate cricket?
Because they can't get a "homerun."
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t get to home run!
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
Why did the squirrel swim on its back?
So it didn't get its nuts wet.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to Hell?
He couldn't get up the stairway to Heaven.
Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? A: Apples get picked.