Gas

Gas Jokes

Blonde

Three women—a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead—are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two hours later, their vehicle dies with no gas, and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them.

The brunette brings canteens of water.

The redhead takes a large beach umbrella.

The blonde somehow rips off the car door.

The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?"

To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."

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  • Putin

    What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.

    Human

    How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?

    Turn on the gas chamber.

    Hitler

    Q: Why is Hitler better than Biden?

    A: Because Hitler gave gas to his people for free.

    Kit Kat

    So, a guy walks into a gas station and walks to the person working and says, "Can I have a Kit Kat Chunky?" So she gets him one, and then he says, "No, I want a normal Kit Kat, you fat bitch!"

    Engineering

    A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.

    This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.

    Pokémon

    What does an electric-type Pokémon say when they get gassy while drinking milk?

    I’m Zaptos intolerant!

    People

    Why is Hitler better than Biden?

    Because Hitler gave his people gas for free.

    Germany

    What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.

    Laughter

    What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?

    You die of laughter.

    Science

    Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium?

    Because you are looking a little bit GaY.

    Halloween

    A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"

    The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."

    The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.