Fucking jokes
Fuck it, suicide is wrong, but if you jump off a bridge and yell "parkour," it's a failed stunt.
I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.
When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".
I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!
I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.
(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)
(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)
(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)
Having sex while camping is fucking in tents (intense).
What do you call a man with a Johnny on his nose? Fuck nose.
Why are gay dudes so rude?
Because they're fucking assholes.
¡Hola, soy Dora!
Can you help me find the two fucks I'm supposed to give?!
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
"WASSUP GIRLS IF I FIND YOU I'LL GLADLY FUCK YOU;]"
Jack and Jill wanted some pills.
So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he had to get a breathalyzer test.
What do you do after fucking the loosest pussy ever?
Close the casket.
Haters are hating. I'm still alluring, but I couldn't give a fuck cus this site is dying and boring.
I heard life was a gift. Well, I hope they kept the receipt, because I'd like a mother-fucking refund!
I yo yo-yo yo-yo yo-yo, yo-yo yo-yo you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you ha! Frick, fuck, gosh dang, you’re so big that you can’t ride. This is Builder.
A Chinese guy said to his friend: "I saw you fucking your donkey yesterday."
His friend: "No, that's impossible, it's too hot inside."
F*** man, I just need a f***ing loli to walk all over me!
Mario: Princess Peach got kidnapped again!
Luigi: Where did they go?
Mario: To the left.
Luigi: Fuck
Can't be bothered with jokes, me and Syd Drake f**k 24/7.
You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."