Why was the depressed man happy in food-tech?

He got to cut himself.

What is you main food Me:pizza cause i’m cheesy Friend: Chocolate chips cause i have a lot of friends Girlfriend: donut cause i have a lot of cream

whats a orphans fav food, nothing they cant afford it

Spanish is difficult when my mom gives me food she says toma and that’s drink in English so I always drink my food

My Cat sleeps about 20 hours a day. She has her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her. She visits the Dr. once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this she pays nothing, and nothing is required of her. She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep. If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free. She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day. I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head, Holy Sh*t, my Cat is a Democrat!

how bout that aierplane food? i eat it when im high

Instead of walking through the door, the owner of the house broke in through the window. When he came out, a man standing on the sidewalk walked up to him and asked why he hadn’t just walked through the door. The owner responded, “I’m pollo vegetarian, and I really just wanted a bit of food.” When the man looked confused, the owner said; “Windows are nature’s vending machine.”

Why are your eyes blue? CUZ THEY HAVE FOOD COLOURING IN THEM

what do food and jokes have in common… some people dont get them

HAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHA

Arby’s fast food, and abortion clinic, your dead babies are our taters and gravies.

A three strangers have opened a gay chat; but if one left the chat, the chat will be closed.

Stranger 3: how to turn a straight guy into a gay guy?

Stranger 1: you can’t!

Stranger 2: you can

Stranger 3: how?

Stranger 2: by using the same idea of russian experiment; like in a detention, put him in a closed room full of gay stuff but the difference that he can sleep and he will have a food for 30 days and toilet too.

Stranger 3: great idea, but who can we try first?

Stranger 1: you all gays are evil monsters

Stranger 2: i think the stranger 1 is just a straight spy let’s try this experi-

(the chat has been closed by stranger 1)

I yam a food lover. I also like sweet potatoes.

Student asks teacher if I throw apple & noodles which 1 will fall 1st teacher replied I don’t know then student replied noodles will fall 1st because noodles r fast foods

My mom told me that She and the owner of Chinese made a deal. Now we l get free Chinese food. So .I ask my mom why do we get free Chinese food then my mom said I love him long time.

My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason he hit me, OOF.

Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids. Knuckle babies don’t eat.

your mom is so fat she ate an ipad and said ahqah! funny food mmm banana and hehe haha! and whar del with airline footd its not white and its not black and its not asain ! ?AHAH?DSF

what worng with airline food…! theier not blakc and there not poeple. hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahXD!!! your’e welcom?

Two muffins are sitting in a bar.

The first muffin says to the bartender, “I’ll have the usual”.

The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human like structure, muffins lack brains which are an essential part to being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak. Thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.

once i ate a table… it was food consuming