Flight

Flight jokes

Airplane

    • "Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."

    - Sun Tzu

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    • Lady

    • Three ladies were on a flight when suddenly the captain announced, "Please prepare for a crash landing."

    The first lady put on all her jewelry. Surprised by this, the other ladies questioned her actions. The first lady replied, "Well, when they come to rescue us they will see that I am rich and will rescue me first." The second lady, not wanting to be left behind, began to take off her top and bra. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, when they come to rescue us, they will see my great tits and will take me first." The third lady who was African, not wanting to be outdone, took off her pants and panties. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, they always search for the black box first."

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    • Flight memes

    Pilot

    • Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.

    Passengers: *Clap*

    Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.

    Flight Attendant: And what is that?

    Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*

    Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---

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    • Flight Attendant

    • It was dinner in the plane, and the flight attendant asked the passenger if he would like dinner.

    "What are my choices?" the passenger said.

    "Yes or no," the flight attendant replied.

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    • WiFi

    • Me: Which WiFi are we on?

    Coworker: Should be floor 89.

    Me: What about flight 104?

    Coworker: Oh crap!

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    • God

    • I’m a god, and I’m here to flex on you bitches. My flight to New York on September 11th was rocky, but I lived.

    Imagine dying on a plane, fr. At least try and respawn:/

    9/11

    • When you play Flappy Bird in 9/11, the bird is a plane and the obstacle courses are towers.

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