Flight jokes
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
If a bird flies, and a duck can also run and fly, while a cat walks, why do we drink water?
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
You can only say "Kobe" now when you're playing flight simulator.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
My mom once ate a full giant cheesecake, and we were walking to our flight back home, and she had to sh*t.
We were walking to the bathroom, and she full on [did it] in front of the carousel. She had a lump of poo in her pants... True story, haha!
What did one plane say to the other? "Let's fly!"
I was on a flight to California, but my next in the Empire State Building.
Yo, hairline looking like a flight trajectory path.
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
I took a plane to go see my hairline.
How do you scare a lot of people in New York?
Open a mobile hotspot named "Delta Inflight Wifi."
I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.
If a chicken flies into the plane and the plane crashes, whose fault is it?
A: The driver's. Chickens can't fly.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?
Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.
I wonder if Kobe Bryant enjoyed his last flight.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
They forgot to pack.