Farm jokes
Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?
A: Home to see their mama!
What do you call a male cow that snores?
A “Bull Dozer”.
They're blooming a gay chicken.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, he can't tell me.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in!
Two drunk men spot a pig on some old farmer's land.
And they were real hungry (or so they said), and they both decided to take the pig with them into their car and eat it somewhere.
And so they did, and the farmer came out with a gun while they hurriedly drove off, and the farmer said, "Well goddammit, if it was a pig they wanted, why didn't they just take my wife?"
What kind of bees produce milk?
Boobies.
Why did the cow smell?
'Cause the horse gave it a pat on the back.
What do you call a fantastic goat?
Goatastic! So funny please like.
My sister has cows, and after 4 months, she said there was a mis-steak.
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
What happened when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence? Complete and utter destruction.
What did the cow say to the other?
"Cheese!"
Why do cows have big [udders]? Because they have big balls.
We were discussing cows in a lesson. I asked my teacher why she was one.
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
I don't know, go google it.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the “utter” side.
Why can you never find a virgin cow on a field with no bulls for miles? Just ask the redneck farmer.