Farm jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
What do you call a three-legged cow?
Disabled.
A guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud, "This is the pig I screw when you're on the rag."
His wife replies, "That's not a pig, it's a sheep."
He says, "I was talking to the sheep."
One hot day a cow wanted some shade.
He found a tree and started resting under it, but there was a chicken bothering him. The cow exclaimed, "Moooove!" The chicken didn't move. Again, "Moooove!" and still the chicken wouldn't move. The cow yelled, "MOOOOOVE!" The chicken turned around and said, "FUCKOFF."
Where do cows eat lunch?
In the calfeteria, dumb butt!
Stupid cow.
A farmer has 3 fat ugly cows. One is named Xia. The next is named Chiang. What's the third?
Yu.
Dad goat: Son, do you know what I like to eat?
Son goat: No, what?
Dad goat: Goat meat.
Son goat: *Gasps*
Dad goat: Nah, I'm just KIDing.
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
Why was there a, ummmmm, a cow?
.......... To moo.
Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?
'Cause they were using fowl language!
How do cows like to play games? Moobile (Mobile).
Chicken
Why did the chicken cross the road?
How do cows say "oof?"
They say, "MOOf."
Why were the cows so noisy in the barn?
Because they had horns!
What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow?
Dead chicken and dead cow.
I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.
I remarked, "You lazy!"
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef jerky.