Family jokes
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.
Kid: I need help!
Mom: Help your balls.
Hey, don’t Orpheus have friends because people do have family?
My pansexual son was asked to form a sentence with a word "Carry" on his zoom class earlier on today and he said "Pessi was carried by Iniesta and Neymar to his Mickey Mouse UCL". He received a standing ovation. Children are our hope and I'm proud of the education system!
You're adopted, that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk!
Q: Why don’t orphans have a personality?
A: They don’t have a person in reality!
Why does an orphan go to church?
So they can call someone "father."
Joe Mama!
My mom left me at a very young age.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home base to run to.
What do my cock and money have in common?
Your mom.
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.
You're so ugly, your mother thought about setting you up for adoption.
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have someone to call daddy.
Why was the orphan's first phone an XR?
Because it had no home button.
Why can’t the orphan tell on people?
Because they got no mom and dad! LOLLL
Guys stop before I tell my parents!
I remember my son's last words: "I stubbed my toe!"