Family jokes

What do you call an orphan? Homeless.

What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.

Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.

Yo mama is so hairy that she brushed it like her hair and put pins on it.

Girl: Rip, mother, I love you.

Me: Sorry for your loss.

Girl: Stop, I have a boyfriend.

Me: Stop, I have a mother.

Knock! Knock!

Who's there?

Momma?

Momma who?

Big Momma!

My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't have a home.

You are family.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they have no home to run to.

Why can’t orphans go on “go big or go home?”

Cuz they’d always have to go big as they have no home.

Why can't orphans play baseball? They ain't got no home to run to.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Sister.

Sister who?

My sister's ass.

Why is something orphans can never say?

"Let's go home."

Today I asked my sis to take out the trash, and I shoved her outside!

I didn’t orphan never say home.

Because they didn’t have one.

My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.

Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.

Yo mama is so stupid, she had to retake preschool 20 times!

Yo mama so hairy, you got carpet burn when you were born.

Hi, how are you? Busy doing right? I just texted me and my dad and walk home from home and walk home and walk walk home.

Hi, how are you? I was busy doing something right. I just texted because me and my dad were going to.

You can't give an orphan homework.