Family jokes
I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.
My life is so sad it's because you're in it.
Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat a whole species went extinct.
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
Why is the older brother's kid brother that has autism always performing fellatio on his older brother?
Because he wants to find out how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.
When you found out Queen Elizabeth ii on fortnite ._.
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you 'cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT, WHAT!
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because then they can play catch.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
Not like they can tell their parents.
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO
Last Christmas was awesome, the whole family came.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
Nothing is lost until Mom can't find it.
My dad is Al-Qaeda, and he even took a plane trip to New York in 2001.
What is wrong with orphans' phones?
They'll never have a home screen.
Why can't an orphan play football? Because they don't have a dad or mom.
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
Because they come back.
I went to the orphanage and yelled "your mama" jokes.
From your mom.
If you have a daughter, give her the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer, you get two beers, and when you call for sex, you get two sex...