Family jokes
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked.
How is sports like regular life for orphans?
They don't get picked for either.
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?
Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.
Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.
Why was the kid sad?
He was adopted.
this is me
I adopted you. Now say goodbye, you missed your Spanish lesson...
Where was your mom last night? In the man club?
Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?
Little Johnny: "Your wife."
What do Gay Men and Minorities have in common?
My dad hates them both!
Why can orphans not play baseball? They can't hit a home run.
Why did my dad bring a bomb vest to fit in with his Taliban brothers?
When an orphan finds out who their parents are, and then finds out they're dead.
I'm an orphan, so kidnap me.
Q: Why can orphans never be criminals?
A: Because they're never wanted.
Why can't an orphan be gay?
They have no one to call daddy.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
What's the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Answer: The mosquito stops sucking if you slap hard enough.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apples get picked! 🤪
What are an orphan's favorite shoes?
White Vans.
If my son was a real man, I wouldn't have caught him fucking another man.