Family jokes

Don't adopt people, or else your parents are gonna say you're ACTUALLY adopted, k thx. No jokes anymore, bye.

I was walking, and I saw an orphan, and I said, "Where are your parents?"

Evan, me and your mom are done with you.

"Send me back, I never liked you."

Why do people name a kid "Rob?" Because they want him to rob a bank so they could adopt new kids to lock in their basement for a late-night toy.

Grandma: calls You: Hello Grandma, what are you doing? Why, you can't mean I'm right in the house right now? Grandma: I didn't mean to call you, bye.

What's the difference between a happy family and a car guy? Only one has a family.

My dad left me.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jo. Jo who? Jo Auntie.

What did one orphan say to another? Where's your home?

A child with cancer says, "Mother, what will I be when I grow up?"

Then the mother says, "Shut up, dick, you have cancer!" Hehehe.

A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.

Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"

Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"

What is the difference between the human rights act and a dad?

Why can't orphans play cricket? Because they can't find home.

Why did the Orphan have imaginary parents?

Because his last parents existed.

Why can’t an orphan hit a home run? Because he doesn’t have a home.

Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”

Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?

A: They don’t have a home to run back to.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home base.

Just to an orphan.

Orphan: You're stupid.

You: You're so ugly, it's the reason your parents are dead.