Family jokes
It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”
Your kid's so ugly he would make a Happy Meal cry.
The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can never do a home run.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
I walked in on my little sister when she was naked.
The thing I have to say is that my little sister is a big sister with big tits & ass with juicy lips upstairs & downstairs. I say whoever is going to be my brother-in-law is going to be a very happy person.
What's it like to have the best daughter in the world? You'll have to ask grandma!
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
What kind of flour do orphans use to make bread?
Self-raising.
Person: You can't kill an orphan!
Me: What are they going to do, go tell their parents?
Who needs parents to be great?
What do you call a child with no family?
Names.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why do cops never put orphans in jail?
Because they aren't wanted.
An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.
Sometimes orphans can't win spelling bees because they don't know how to spell "home."
A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:
"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."
Your mama is so ugly whenever she threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.
Q: What do you call a virgin from Alabama?
A: An orphan.
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.