Family jokes

What's the difference between an orphan and a slice of pizza?

Nothing, I eat both of them.

What instrument do orphans play?

The sax alone.

Man: Stop with these orphan jokes!

Me: Why? Are they going to tell their parents on me?

I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"

I made a website about orphans.

But I can’t make a home page.

Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?

Because it doesn’t have a home button.

Sometimes when I think I'm ugly, I just think of my sister and it makes me feel better.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Mama.

Big Mama. Big Mama can't fit through the door.

Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They don’t have a dad to go with.

POV: You're an orphan.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Not your mom.

Roses are red, violets are blue, like my hole, Uncle Bill is making me full, better run here he comes!

What do you call an orphan's parents?

Dead meat.

Stranger: Knock knock.

Orphan: Who's there?

Stranger: Not your parents.

I still remember my grandpa's last words.

"Stop shaking the damn ladder!"

Why can you bully orphans?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.

So I left my mom with my baby, and I was terrified when I came back; the wheelchair was in the water.

What was the orphan's first video game console?

PS5 because it has no home button.

How did the orphan go to school?

Not by his parents.

There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they don’t have a home to run to.