Family jokes
Your hairline is so big it took your mom a map to find it.
I made a website for orphans.
There’s no homepage.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are like your parents, separated.
What cookie has an orphan never had?
Homemade.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Yo momma's like a cloud, when she disappears, it's a beautiful sunny day.
My parents found my YT channel. I hate myself now, and I'm emotional.
SELF HARM
My mom said if I'm awake playing Roblox still, she said she was going to bang my head against the keyboard. hxhdhduhxbsfj.
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
Why did the orphan go to church?
So he could call someone Father.
What kind of flour do orphans use to bake bread?
Self-raising flour.
Why is an orphan afraid to play baseball?
They are afraid they won't find home.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
What school can’t orphans go to?
Home school.
What's the similarity between my son and a rug from eBay? I asked for a refund.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH