If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
Family Jokes
Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.
My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.
I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?
Why does an orphan like home base? Because he doesn't have one.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
What do you tell twins that are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourselves!
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their parents.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What type of phones do orphans have?
IPhone XR—it has no home button.
Yesterday I was asked where my parents are. I said, "Getting milk."
Me: Joe left today.
Orphan: Who's Joe?
Me: Joe mama!
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.
Why does this website have a home page? It's an orphan joke waiting to happen.
Why don't teachers give orphans homework? Because they can't go home...
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone.
Hippity hoppity, you are no one's property.
A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"
The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."
