Family jokes
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
What makes a cult and a racist family of 5 common?
Not all are friends.
Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents!
Yo mama so fat that she was born on the 3rd, 4th, and 5th of March.
Why do orphans like the movie Home Alone?
Because they're home alone themselves!
My wife said she wanted to leave me. She said it’s because of the abuse, but really, she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got poisoning the next day. This shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physically and mentally.
Why do orphans not buy a keyboard? Because they can’t use the home button.
My mum told me to take out the trash, but I couldn’t find you.
Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"
What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.
Orphan jokes aren't to be made fun of.
They're just aimed at older audiences. Oh wait.
THEY AREN'T EVEN OLDER AGES.
How do you find out if your kid is gay?
Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
What is soccer like when you lose your soccer ball?
Orphan: "My Parents."
Kid: I got homework.
Mom: Ok, so?
Kid: I got a F in my balls.
Kid: I need help!
Mom: Help your balls.
Yo mama is so fat that when I was printing a picture of her last year, it's still printing.
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.