What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. Orphanages are really fun to work at.
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?
"Two wongs don’t make a white."
My mom has a toy that I see all the girls and guys seem to play with, and the toy is between my mom's legs.
As a brother, I have to report my sister has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great personality.
Motherhood is like a fairy tale, but in reverse. You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people.