Family jokes
You are so ugly when you gave birth to your baby, you gave it carpet burn.
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
My Mom said, "I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied."
Well, I said, "Have you seen her?"
My sister thinks she's so smart and funny. The only thing that is funny is her face.
What did the dad say when he left the lollipop store?
"Cya suckers!🍭"
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an airplane landing strip? Don't know, neither did my dad.
Why can't Orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Girl: Wanna come over to my house?
Orphan: I have to ask if my parents come home.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
I was happy for once, and my family was happy I was happy, but that all changed when they found out I was thinking about bridges and humans.
Why can't orphans get a job?
Because they don't have a home.
A kid decided to burn his house down.
His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, "That's arson."
What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.
My little brother is scared of ghosts so I won't let him watch Bayern today.
Okay, I may be strict, but I won't let Tapindowski give my son a heart attack. His shocking ghosting performance today is a danger to my family and I'll ask UEFA to investigate the matter.
Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?
Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.
Why was Kobe a good father?
He took his daughter with him.
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
I ear ass your dad's ass and he likes it.
Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?
Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.
Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.
Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.
Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.
Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?
Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?
Your mom and your dad.