Family jokes
Why does an orphan use water for his cereal?
He is waiting for his dad with the milk.
My mom was telling me about different pastas. So many pastabilities!
My grandmother made her passage on the Titanic. The ship was not the only thing that went down.
You're so skinny, your mom actually enjoyed your birth!
After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.
You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.
Orphans actually have an advantage. Nobody can call them motherless or test-tube babies in an argument.
What do you call an autistic daughter?
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
I don't understand why people hate it when they hear a dad joke. They are actually pretty funny, and I will show you Y. (shows a picture of the letter Y)
Why don't orphans have any friends?
Because they don't have homies.
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
What do orphans get on Xmas?
Lonely.
Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.
My dad went to go get milk.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because it can never find home.
When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.
Me: You f&*k up.
The class: Oh sh!&
When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."
What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?
They both don't have parents.
What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?
My stepdad did beat cancer.
What’s an orphan's favorite beer?
Foster's.